Sampling purgatory

I’ve never had the greatest understanding of purgatory.  Today, I had a break-through, an inkling of what it might be like.  Wal-Mart is purgatory on earth.  Let me be even more precise, Wal-Mart, on a lunch hour from work, is purgatory on earth.  To double-check my comparison, I found this definition of purgatory:

a place or condition of suffering or torment, esp one that is temporary

Yep, Wal-Mart.

Pig farmer gets angry every time we go to Wal-Mart because the quantity of bags never aligns with the quantity of $$ spent.  I try to soften the blow for him by making little, in-between, trips to Wal-Mart for a few extras, make-up, hair products, etc, that his pig farmer-mind doesn’t understand and so that the $$ isn’t so overwhelming (thoughtful, aren’t I?).

Pig farmer has also “grounded” me to the car at times.  Such as those times when I say, “I just need to run in for a couple of things.”  He has told me, “Stay in the car, because if you go in, it will take forever.”  It is not my fault that we will run into people to talk to while we are in there.  “Okey-dokey,” I say, “you win!  I’ll stay in the car while you go in.”  😉

Today’s lunch hour, though, was one of those I’ll-spare-pig-farmer-the-pain trips to Wal-Mart.  OH. MY. GOSH.  It was an exercise in patience for me.  People I have never seen in my life were out today.  So, it should have been quick, right?  No, they were the slow-movers-down-the-middle-of-the-aisle shoppers.  They were also couponers.  I knew I was in trouble when the blue-haired person in front of me told the cashier, “Just run it through.  It’ll take it.”  The cashier checked each coupon to each item.  Items that were already bagged and in the cart.  Painstakingly.  The blue-hair kept insisting that “the beeper would run ’em through.”  The problem was, the coupons were not for the brand she had purchased.  The cashier explained that the store “would get written up” in the great coupon book of life if she accepted coupons that didn’t match purchases.  I eye-balled other lines.  I had already put my items on the belt.  What would be quicker?

A noise drew my attention back to my line … my cashier was blowing her nose.  And then wiped her hands on her hips.  Then turned to me with my deer-in-the-headlights-look.  Then she rubbed both her eyes with the palms of her hands and made a groaning noise.  She started scanning my items and I snapped out of my frozen state.  Luckily, I had not yet had time to eat or I think I would have lost my lunch.  I could not get out of there quickly enough.

I almost asphyxiated myself with the overdose of antibacterial cleaner I slathered on when I got to my car.

Why is it that I can scoop poop, wrestle animals that out-weigh me many times over and complete many outdoor chores that should be more disgusting … but Wal-Mart is what throws me over the edge?

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About Marla Rose

This blog documents country life in central Illinois with lots of pictures, and various other ideas/adventures that come my way. My hope is to make you laugh (or at least smile) and appreciate this life!
This entry was posted in Country Living, Work/Career and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

14 Responses to Sampling purgatory

  1. Nora says:

    You said it so right Marla…Can be a nasty place at times!!! 🙂

  2. Susan says:

    I feel the very same way! A visit to Wal-Mart is just like cleaning the toilet…..it’s a dirty job but somebody’s got to do it……and in my house, that lucky person is me! You’ve posted a story I’m sure we all can identify with!

  3. Jerry says:

    The Pig Farmer is my hero.

  4. hollykaann says:

    I so agree! That is why as of Jan 30 2013 we swore off Wal-mart. No walmart for 365 days. So far so good!

    • Impressive! Where are you shopping? I’ll look back at your blog and see if I find anything on it.

      • hollykaann says:

        I haven’t been posting about it, but I should people are most intrigued- like no one can remember what we did before wal-mart.
        I shop at Brookshires- an almost local grocery store. A little more money but not much and they have boys who take my stuff to my car. The dollar store, hardware store and I do a lot of errands when I go into Dallas for stuff. It does take more planning and work but it is so nice to be irritated every time I have to go to the store.

  5. Marla – I still shop at Wal-Mart but the price has to be right. Nowadays, I can do better by hitting the BOGOS at a few grocery stores, Dollar General, Dollar Tree and I’m not above cashing in on the freebies on Craigslist (recently got some bamboo for my veggie garden). It comes down to this: I don’t really want to support Wal-Mart and the way they treat employees, so it motivates me to shop elsewhere. Even the big box home improvement stores will have A/C filters cheaper.

  6. dayphoto says:

    You had me laughing out loud several times………………OH HOW I AGREE! I don’t have time to shop all over so I do my shopping there. I try to hurry……….TRY…our Wal-Mart hires checkers over the age of 100 so not only do they get sick and pass it on, they also take two years and three months to get your three items through and bagged. Drives me nuts!

    Linda
    http://coloradofarmlife.wordpress.com
    http://deltacountyhistoricalsociety.wordpress.com

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